Dear Willow Rose,
Tonight, I think of you as I feed a machine. Attached to cords and electricity, I allow them to drain me of your life sustenance so that I can give it to you when you are ready for it. They have to be monitored for the appropriate levels of pull.
But when your sweet lips are on me, I will be so much more at peace, Your ever gentle angelic ask at my breasts a contrast to the demand of the machine. I will hold your sweet sweet head and cradle you with love, while you move closer and closer to my ventricled closet of love.
Our loves will unite when you come home to me, heal Willow, so we both can.
When the women of the world were created, with breasts enough to entrance you each, did it occur to you that there was something more to them?
If a man has had sweets eternally, enough to feminine his figure, is it enough to draw the same appeal?
If it is not then what magic does a woman have that a weighted man does not? Is it perhaps the thousands of years of women shedding blood to grant you life and allow you to live it as your own?
Or is it simply the tempting angle of th unsacrificed woman who you could perhaps persuade in you to drown?
Babies are born when a mommy and daddy love each other,
And the stars all align,
And no one gets sick,
And all the genes add up correctly,
And the mother is perfectly still,
But not so perfectly still that the baby dies,
And if the mothers doesn’t take hot baths,
But takes warm baths,
And if the mother doesn’t drink,
But maybe if she drinks just a little red wine,
And if all the mothers hormones are perfectly balanced,
In a world that jacks up your hormones with everything you eat,
Milk, GMO anything, lunchmeat is bad, some veggies are bad
Which ones depends on who you talk to,
Doctors don’t really want you having babies either,
So it’s not like they get it.
Having babies is easy,
Just natural old childbirth.
Do you hear the melody of the candles flame?
Can you feel the smoke as it twists through your nose?
Are you waiting for everyday’s chores to tornade-o into your mind,
Or are you capable of this moment, quiet and clean?
Tell me traveler if the time stops running by,
But not until you close your eyes and fly.
Vengeance is Mine.
The land runs red with the lives of so many.
Politicians clamoring for it to echo with their truth,
Screaming out for their own brand of justice,
The one that makes them Ceaser,
A head on their very own golden coin.
Riches mean more to them that the lives of the little people.
But doesn’t anyone hear them cry out,
“Vengeance, Vengeance, God my King,
Or at least Peace?”
But you can’t receive peace when the world cries out for war.
War on the peaceful, war on the lonely,
War on the forsaken ones until nothing is left.
And still they clamor for death over a false letter A,
And they won’t be happy until the streets are paved with blood.
Morning Pages are stupid,
Like a prayer to a void that doesn’t hear you.
I can hear critics saying now
Why would she say a void that won’t hear you?
Of course a void doesn’t hear you!”
Well, it’s not redundant if it’s for emphasis.
I want the reader to feel the isolation.
Sometimes you scream into the void
Praying someone might hear something,
But in this instance they never do,
And they never will.
So, now my husband writes erotica. And the weird thing is, I’m kinda jealous. Like, I might start writing it too. I write poetry, stories, screenplays, whatever, let’s just add in sex stories! Because people are not already freaked out enough by me. Oh and I sell sex toys, and I want to learn how to do tantric yoga. From the outside/my mom, I look like such a freak! Like, clearly this chick has no morals. Somehow, though, this IS my morals. I believe sex is so important, and I believe that it reveals so much to us about God, that I really believe we are supposed to enjoy it and explore together in it.
Anyway, so all these changes are inspiring me to do a lot of thinking about social conventions, and what’s “OK.” I was talking to a friend of mine the other day, and she was talking about all her political opinions and I said that there’s so much conflict about this stuff that I don’t even have opinions about it. Throughout the conversation though, I realized that it’s not that I don’t have opinions on these. It’s that I DO have opinions on certain things that are so much more important that I don’t get into the petty things.
I like to live by the two great commandments, basically love God with all your heart, and love your neighbor. I believe in those two above the other commandments, and it saddens my heart when others disregard those in favor of so many other stupid things. Why are we screaming at people and throwing things at them and refusing to go to their weddings because they love a different than we believe they should, instead of throwing all of that energy into saving baby lives? Why are we shoving horribly graphic images of destroyed babies in people’s faces and then saying we are “pro life”? Let me tell you, I do not think life is a good thing when I am looking at pictures like that!
I just think the world would be better if we taught Christlike love, instead of Old Testament Vengeance. I’m not saying that God doesn’t have rules, but I think a lot of Christians have their priorities all the kinds of out of whack.